We see the world from our perspective.
The child who was attacked by a dog sees all dogs as dangerous.
The child who grew up with a playful pup sees dogs as friendly.
The person who is distrustful finds treachery where-ever she looks and has few friends.
The person who believes the best of people, receives their best and has many friends.
The person who sees herself as a failure does not try to succeed.
The person who sees herself as a success does not let failure bother her.
Your life, like this pane of glass, reflects back to you who you are.
Is your life working the way you want it to? If not, take 10 minutes to sit quietly – without interruptions – and reflect on your patterns of thinking, “seeing” and behaving that need to change in order to have the life that you want.
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We don’t see things as they are, we see things as we are. Anais Nin
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Hi Cherry-
It is so true that we create out reality by our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. A lot of the experiences were shaped in childhood for sure, but as adults we are equipped with the faculties and resources to change the distorted beliefs, and make sense of the painful memories.
Lovely image, too:).
Thanks Linda. I agree that as adults we can change our distorted belief systems and what I’ve also found in my work is that oft times people are not aware of their underlying beliefs, making it difficult to change. But that’s, your job helping them find awareness. :) Cherry
This is lovely, Cherry. It challenges us to think/rethink our perspectives without a lot of weight. I am always amazed at how one word or a phrase can turn our perspectives around or inside out or inward. The more skilled we are at picking the right words and avoiding the wrong ones, the more settled we can become. ~Dawn
Thanks for the compliment and saying things don’t have to have “a lot of weight”. Because I struggled – slightly – with writing a post that was so “light”. Guess I was caught up in some erroneous belief about writing. Cherry
Loved this short and to the point post, Cherry. Especially liked the challenge to pause and reflect on our thinking of where we are and where we want to be, so we can more clearly find our way from one place to the other. So on the same page with you today. Seems clearer and clearer to me that we are what we see, and therefore the responsibility is ours, hopefully to enjoy, and, as Ghandi is known to have said, “Be the change” we want to see in the world. Thanks again!
You’re welcome Athena. After reading your most recent post, I agree we’re on the same page.
In the end, the responsibility is ours to change but that’s not to say we don’t need help, support & nudges from people to get us past initial fear or inertia. Cherry
I liked this post and the examples. Also liked the quote from Ghandi by Dr Staik. I was trained in Cognitive-Behavior Therapy. I agree with you it is important to counter negative thoughts or at least to keep an open mind and test your beliefs against real-world evidence. My favorite supervisor used to say that most problem behaviors were ways to survive or functional responses in a dysfunctional environment. When clients grow up, they often don’t realize the contingencies have changed and get stuck with a rigid response pattern, be it aggression, avoidance etc. your post makes me think about research that negative expectations can become self-fulfilling prophecies, making you behave in a way that makes you more likely to be rejected or alienate others.
Melanie,
I’ve lived the life you mentioned – learning coping/survival mechanisms in childhood that did not serve me in adult hood. But they were so ingrained, and I was unaware of the source of my behaviors that it took me a while to get past them and in certain situations I can still fall backwards. I just get out of the behavior more quickly now.
I too, really like Gandhi’s quote. Cherry
Hi Cherry – A good to-the-point post. I have been becoming more cynical lately as I watch what is happening in our country, the strange movement to revoke/limit freedoms we already have. I am trying to counter this, but I am nor being so successful. I am watching how ppl are polarizing and digging in (survival mode is so easily triggered!) and it scares me. I try to maintain an open perspective, but I think I am not succeeding. Thanks!
Kathy,
I find what’s going on frightening as well. I use to ignore the news as a way of not getting drawn into the collective fear but with the internet that’s more difficult to do. Keep working on that open perspective. Cherry
Very true. It ties in pretty well with my current post about living a draft life and what’s holding you back. It’s amazing how much word choice matters because it does trigger different feelings with different people too…
Definitely connects with your post. Also so true that the same event triggers people differently. Sometimes it’s surprising how much so, until you hear their story. Thanks for stopping by Daria. Cherry